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Idiots more.... I am surrounded!

It amazes me, idiots get stupid and worse then ever thought before, People who go through life doing their own things not knowing how their actions will affect others, I think to myself at the ER desk as I write a few words someone might never read and could be a warning or prophecy. We laugh we , we cry, we laugh more, we lose sleep, People think their choises are theirs and don't affect others, poor nieve folks! Maybe I should become a philosopher, Why is it that I get a spurt of energy and expertise in my times of tiredness. I have been up several hours probably over 15017 hours. I got up around 0800 yesterday, today I was home maybe 1/2 hour before I was called back for an emergency run, because the primary crew was out on a call. I have been here since then it is noon. I did sleep yesterday afternoon a few hours. I can in starting to feel run down, this job is killing me! I ache, I pop in my shoulders, I pop in my knees and ankles, elbows, I shouldn't be this way at such a young age. I write this hoping no one is reading over my shoulder or finds out who I am am speaking about.

New day. Sleep Later, and I still feel run down. I have the same feeling of wanting to write with the passion and drive I drive I had yesterday but it just isn't there! I have a block, I am not as tired and the feeling just isn't there! I could be driven but not like I was when I was exhausted it is wierd! I can write a few sentences before I get interupted. I see pt.'s who I know by their first names, I laugh inside at those who complain of being tired. If they only knew what tired was! I want to say something badly I just can't find the words. My partner seems less interested in the job then I am, he spends all his time on the computer using the internet to do about anything he can to avoid any type of work, and I have been told I am a helpful person to have around as opposed to having him. That makes me feel good! I am past bURNED OUT! I am BURNT to a crisp! I have vacation totaling around 6 weeks. I put in for 4 days in a couple months. I am going to take a few days and chill if it gets approved. We are short due to the injuries, imagine that, an injury to someone in EMS! We see American's increasing in size and EMS forces decreasing due to injuries and burnout at a rapid rate. The EMT average length of stay is probably around 2 years or less. It was about caring when we all started then it became about money. We all started to feel the pinch on our balls as they raised our insurance, and cut the benefits, they don't understand what being an American Company and caring about your employees means anymore. They just want to work you to death and never offer you benefits. I never get a raise over 3% which ends up being ate up by the increase in insurance. I made $100 bucks more this year over last year, after a raise! I risk my life for the pay similiar to fast food workers who are taking home more then me. In the average year my salary flat rate without my overtime would be around $17,000 Amazing isn't it , they expect you to live off that and retire from that. Bills, are something they don't think anyone should have. They really don't know what a pinch is because the ones making the decisions are making 2-3 times what I make an hour and don't feel the strain we do down here in the barrel. WOW. Did I say that?

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